‘Lift up your self by the Self
And don’t let the Self droop low,
For the Self is the self’s only friend
And the self is the Self’s only foe.’
-Bhagavad Gita 6:5
The Disappearing Act.
It happens. Usually at a point of expansion, growth and change. You step back, shrink, close doors and return to the couch.
The battle for the Spiritual Warrior is always with the self. By the self, I mean that part of you that developed as a defense mechanism, an identity that grew in response to life experiences, learning what kept you safe.
Yet what kept you safe was built on the reactions from and interactions with those closest to you and involved a compromise of who you were, a suppression of your essence, a sculpting designed to please and not offend. It involved a pushing down of your needs and a minimization of your feelings, for survival, approval and acceptance. It was a matter of survival that over time became the prison of ego and at its core was built on fear: fear of rejection, disapproval and loss.
Fear has a low energetic frequency. Its close neighbours are shame and guilt; often used in our culture to ‘manage’ us, often by busy caregivers who do not have the required emotional intelligence or energy themselves, to nurture and guide. It is easier to punish than to guide.
The opposite of fear, is love and it is Love that reaches through and challenges the ego construct. There is a part of ourselves that remains attached to Love, that endless, immutable abundance. Our souls know it and our ego just gets in the way.
The work is to remember who you truly are. Our souls know when we are constricted. They begin to seek freedom. Slowly, or at times rapidly, we remember we are not who we think we are, we realise our thoughts are not us, we realise that we are the Observer of our thoughts, and the liberation can begin.
In the major Arcana of the Tarot, the Tower appears to be a frightening card, with images of lightning striking and destroying a tower, that has been a comfortable, safe home to its inmates. People are falling, rubble all around them, the ground rising up….it certainly is not a welcome image to many. Yet, it is one of my favourite cards. I am very interested when I see it in a reading, because the destruction is only of that comfortable place (ego) that has become a prison. The lightning strike is not malevolent; It is the demolition of all that does not truly serve us. Yes, it involves loss, yes it involves chaos, yes it involves pain, but is that not the process of all transformation?
Know that what is coming to be, will always be greater than what is passing away.